Monday, August 07, 2006

My Dear - 25

To Instructress

My Dear Slimming World Instructress

I didn’t want to miss this chance to tell you what I felt undergoing those “slimming classes”. What a motivation you were, 20 inches in waist and always wearing a size 6 top and a cropped trousers or gym pants, you made sure that we could see your figure well and clearly, didn’t you.

Motivation it was, because when we struggled to count the calories, instead burned by the envy that you caused showing off your 20 inches waist like that. Why do you always put on that smirk when we are weighed in the meeting? Because you secretly believed that we could never lose those extra tyres around our tummy?

Let me tell you a secret. That week when we were humiliated when you wittingly read out our weigh ins …we secretly popped in two malteasers in our mouth. Oh and you must know, I had my aunt send me home made cashew burfi. It was so delicious that I had two 2 inch square pieces at one go. Fantastic! You wouldn’t know those tastes would you, not on your nicotine stained mouth.

Have you ever tasted cashew burfi? Or parathas with Indian ghee? Or badam halwa? Oh how about badusha…melt in the mouth king of sweets - badusha with a glistening coating of sugar crystals? What is your tongue worth if you haven’t tasted these goodies? You’d probably drool over a double chocolate chip cookie sundae and pull deeply into your fag to ward off your cravings. Yeah I know I’ve seen your weakness, on days when the nicotine patch is not there on your arm, you’ve probably had your money’s worth of fags.

I’ll have the last word…having two tyres of fat and being able to relish on the goodness of cashew burfi and sugar coated badusha is far better than your 20 inch waist and tar stained teeth.

I’m so glad I quit your class.




Anonymous Bubby said...

idu romba nallaaa irukku..
and this is what i ask my gym dietician.
well, i even asked them[instructors/ dieticians] if they have tasted things like vattakozhambu, vadaam, porichakoottu, rasam, seppangezhangu roast, paal payasam.. a few of them which form part of our daily saapad unlike their tasteless, lifeless daily saapadu - dal, roti, subzi or roti, subzi, dal or subzi, roti,dal.. what a variety i say!

7:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This was fantastic! I loved the fun spirit that bubbles throughout the email! You did it!

PS: Though I was alarmed by the word "fag" first I breathed happily when I finally dug out that sometimes it could mean cigarettes also! THANK GOOD NESS!!! :) .... This PS is for people like me, who would have got alarmed first stumbling on the word in such a bubbly happy email!

8:05 AM  
Blogger Casement said...

Really nice!:)

5:57 AM  
Blogger tilotamma said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

9:22 AM  
Blogger dogmatix said...

Well!! Isnt that the worst attitude to have?!! rather than focussing on your health/weight, u criticize the instructor for what... having the will power to say 'no'! to cashew burfi!!
The smirk she had at your weigh in.. was probably a work of your imagination as was your 'humiliation' and i will go on a limb and say that for her 'tar-stained' teeth too.

stop giving excuses and get your butt to the treadmill!! no burfi is worth a bypass!!!

11:57 AM  
Blogger LAK said...

Dogmatix, I think the instructress doesn't know cashew burfi, so the question of will power doesn't arise. I would say yes to taste and also yes to will power. Moderation is of course the keyword.

12:37 AM  

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